If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
