To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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