their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Randomize
