dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Randomize