Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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