you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
She's JV to your varsity
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
Randomize
