Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
