she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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