Me. At least after what I've been through.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
