Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
