oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
farters have to be the big spoon...
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Randomize
