I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
