YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
