I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Randomize
