Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
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