I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Randomize