it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
