yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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