I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Randomize
