how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
it glows. i had to have it.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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