i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Randomize