Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
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