Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
