is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
