just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
