Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Randomize
