I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
