So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Randomize
