Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
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