I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
We have started to decorate penises.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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