Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
