I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
