I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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