ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
