i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
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