Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
