its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
