im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
