Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Randomize
