I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
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