Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
