Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Randomize
