he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
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