after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize