Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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