my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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