Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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