so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
