you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
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