Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize
